Keeping the spark alive in your marriage might seem like a lot of work because you probably have to do all the things you did when you first saw her or him, just to enhance the attraction. In retrospect, it is better to do this work than to allow the romance in your marriage to slip away.
As a marriage counselor, I have seen many marriages fall apart because many husbands and wives thought that keeping the spark alive was unnecessary until one of their partners experienced that rush with another person and left the marriage, thinking that the grass was greener on the other side.
Keeping the spark alive is not as hard as you think once you get used to it. Date nights, spa dates, movie time, etc., are activities that help you stay in love with your partner and keep the spark alive.
If you have been looking for ways to keep the spark alive in your marriage, I have explained all that you need to know in this blog post.
14 Ways To Keep The Spark Alive In Your Marriage
These ways to keep the spark alive in your marriage will help you become a better and more intentional partner.
1. Prioritize Regular Date Nights
One of the most effective ways to keep the spark alive in your marriage is by prioritizing regular date nights with your partner. Life can get you super busy with work, kids, and daily responsibilities, but setting aside time just for the two of you is important. Failing to set time aside is dangerous.
Whether it’s a dinner date, a cozy night in with a movie, or a fun activity you both enjoy, date nights help you reconnect and focus on each other without distractions. Consistent date nights with your partner remind you of why you fell in love and allow you to create new memories together.
By the way, if you need date night ideas to enjoy with your partner, here is a list of romantic date night ideas for couples.
2. Surprise Each Other With Small, Thoughtful Gestures
Surprises don’t have to be grand or expensive to make an impact because it is always the intention that counts.
Small, thoughtful gestures will always go a long way in showing your partner that you care because it is one of the ideas to keep the spark alive in your marriage.
These little acts of kindness keep the romance alive by reminding your partner that you’re thinking of them, even during a busy day, and what better way to let your partner know that you love them than by doing these things?
Confused about gestures you can surprise your partner with? Here are some, and if these are not enough, here is a comprehensive list of things you can do to surprise your partner:
- Surprise phone call.
- Pick up a small gift.
- Draw a bath for them.
- Hold hands unexpectedly.
- Plan a future trip together.
- Send a funny meme or video.
- Do a chore they dislike.
- Create a playlist of songs they love.
- Give them a shoulder massage.
- Write a short love letter.
- Leave a note.
- Get them their favorite snack.
- Morning coffee/tea.
- Random texts.
- Plan a mini-date.
- Compliments.
- Cook their favorite meal.
- Bring flowers.
- Warm hug.
3. Communicate Openly And Honestly About Your Feelings
One of the ways to keep the spark alive in your marriage is to make it a habit to communicate clearly and honestly with each other about your feelings, needs, and desires. Avoid letting small issues fester into larger problems by addressing them as they arise.
By being transparent and vulnerable with your partner, you create a deeper emotional connection that strengthens your bond because communication will always be the foundation of any healthy relationship, and it’s especially important for maintaining the spark in your marriage.
Plus, when you are not attracted to your partner anymore, make sure that you speak up and address these issues, they might not just be aware that they have been distant.
4. Try New Activities Or Hobbies Together
Trying new activities or hobbies together brings excitement and novelty into your marriage because it is one of the tips to keep the spark alive in your marriage.
Whether it’s taking a dance class, learning to cook a new cuisine, or exploring a new hiking trail, shared experiences help you bond and create lasting memories that bring you both closer than ever. These activities reignite that sense of adventure you both had when you first started dating and keep your marriage fresh and engaging.
Need an exhaustive list of activities that you should try with your significant other? Then check out this article on fun things to do with your partner.
5. Keep Up Physical Affection, Like Holding Hands And Hugging
Physical affection is a key component for maintaining intimacy in your marriage. This is one of the things in marriage that keeps you and your other half in sync.
Simple acts like holding hands, hugging, or cuddling can help you stay connected on a physical and emotional level. Physical touch releases oxytocin, often referred to as the “love hormone,” which helps strengthen the bond between you and your partner.
Don’t underestimate the power of a gentle touch or a warm embrace to keep the spark alive because it can be what your partner needs to get in the mood, destress, feel good, or feel like they are cared for and they are not alone.
Below are some physical affection ideas to give you a wide range of physical touch activities you can engage in with your partner:
- Gently bite their lower lip during a kiss.
- Run your fingers lightly along their inner thigh.
- Kiss the nape of their neck slowly.
- Brush your lips against their collarbone.
- Pull them closer by the waistband.
- Trail kisses down their spine.
- Lightly graze your teeth over their ear.
- Slide your hand under their shirt, tracing their skin.
- Tease them by kissing just near their lips before pulling away.
- Press your body against theirs while whispering in their ear.
- Hold their hand while walking.
- Rest your head on their shoulder.
- Tickle them lightly during a playful moment.
- Give them a long, warm hug from behind.
- Trace your fingers along their arm.
- Cuddle up close while watching a movie.
- Run your fingers through their hair.
- Gently rub their back or shoulders.
- Kiss the back of their hand.
- Whisper something sweet in their ear.
- Lightly squeeze their thighs while sitting together.
- Brush your lips softly against their forehead.
6. Compliment Each Other Often
Regularly complimenting your partner is one of the ways to keep the spark alive in your marriage. Compliments show that you appreciate and notice your significant other.
Whether it’s complimenting their appearance, their sense of humor, or their efforts around the house, these words of affirmation will always help build your partner’s confidence and remind them of your love.
Compliments are a simple yet powerful way to keep the romance alive. So, if you need ideas to compliment your partner, here is a list of compliments your partner is craving to hear from you.
7. Plan Occasional Getaways, Even If Just For A Weekend
Sometimes, the best way to reignite the spark in your marriage is to change your environment. Your environment can dampen your spark and the sooner you realize that, the better.
Planning occasional getaways, even if just for a weekend, allows you both to focus solely on each other without any distractions. The agenda for your getaway should be to focus on each other, good food, good s#x, good sleep, rinse and repeat. You both can always add a bit of activity to get some fresh air while having fun.
8. Share Your Goals And Dreams With Each Other
Sharing your goals and dreams with your partner is one of the ways to maintain the spark in your marriage and ensure you’re on the same path in life.
Whether it’s career aspirations, travel plans, personal growth goals, or even the most mundane goals, discussing these dreams helps you understand each other’s desires and find ways to support each other.
Supporting each other in achieving these goals also strengthens your partnership, keeps you motivated to grow together, and certainly makes you feel like you’re not alone.
9. Make Time For Deep, Meaningful Conversations
Beyond the daily check-ins and small talk, make time for deep, meaningful conversations with your partner because it is one of the ways to keep the spark alive in your marriage.
Always discuss your thoughts, feelings, fears, and hopes with your other half. These conversations help you understand each other on a deeper level that no one can attain and maintain a strong emotional connection.
It’s through these heartfelt discussions that you can truly connect with your partner and ensure that your marriage continues to grow. Plus, by discussing these deep topics you strengthen your bond with each other.
Confused about how you can have a deep conversation? Here is a list of conversation starters and a list of intimate questions you can ask your partner.
10. Reminisce About Your Favorite Memories Together
Taking time to reminisce about your favorite memories together will rekindle the feelings you had when you first fell in love.
Looking through old photos of your first date or a special trip you took together is beautifully nostalgic. Reflecting on these happy moments helps you remember the foundation of your marriage because it is one of the ways on how to keep the spark alive in your marriage.
11. Be Spontaneous And Break Out Of Your Routine Occasionally
Routines can be comforting and stable but they can also make a marriage feel stagnant over time because when the actions that make dopamine or the oxytocin become predictable then excitement hits its threshold and begins to reduce.
To keep the spark alive, it’s important to be spontaneous and break out of your routine occasionally. Surprise your partner with a last-minute dinner date, take an unplanned weekend trip, or try something completely new together.
Spontaneity adds excitement and keeps your marriage dynamic because it is one of the ways to keep the spark alive in your marriage.
12. Show Appreciation For The Little Things Your Partner Does
One of the things my husband does that makes me fall in love with him all over again is appreciating me for the things I do. Showing appreciation for the little things your partner does every day will always have a big impact on your marriage.
Whether it’s thanking your partner for making you coffee in the morning, acknowledging their help with household chores, or appreciating their kindness, expressing gratitude helps your other half feel loved and seen. This attitude encourages more loving behavior and strengthens your bond, making it one of the tips for keeping the spark alive when you’re married.
13. Keep A Sense Of Humor And Laugh Together
Laughter is one of the things to do to keep the spark alive in your marriage because a marriage full of love is a marriage that will last. A shared sense of humor helps you navigate difficult times and keeps your marriage light and joyful.
Find reasons to laugh together, whether it’s watching a funny movie, telling jokes, or simply finding humor in everyday situations.
Couples who laugh together often have stronger, more resilient marriages because they are not focused on what is not working.
14. Maintain A Strong Sense Of Trust And Loyalty
Trust and loyalty are the cornerstones of a strong marriage because, without it, it’s difficult to maintain a healthy, loving marriage.
One of the ways to keep the spark alive in your marriage is to be reliable, honest, and faithful to your partner. Consistently demonstrating your commitment to your partner helps build a sense of security in your partner that will help them sleep better at night.
In Summary: Ways To Keep The Spark Alive In Your Marriage
These tips for keeping the spark alive when you’re married require consistent effort, but the rewards are well worth it because many marriages I know that would have crumbled due to external factors are still thriving well today.
By prioritizing your marriage, finding ways to connect with your partner, and being the partner they need you to be, you can build a marriage that will stand the test of time.
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